You are so annoying. You make me feel insecure about my incredible intelligence, and even though you undress me with your gross cow eyes, I am offended more than into it. When I see you sitting across the class in your gross loser clothes I just want to throw something at you. Maybe like a pomegranate, but like a rotten one. Oh yeah.
When I see the public transit bus, sometimes I wish it just wouldn't stop. Just once, maybe, you'd be away from me at school and maybe I could get back on my babe train express. You and your gross shoulder pads and pant suits make for excellent hottie repellent. The other day I had to drive through Van Nuys. Remember that time I came to your house? I was slumming. I admit ok, in a moment of weakness I almost slipped down for a gross apple off the ground. Sue me.
Hopefully next time you see me you will be crying or just too embarassed to look my way. But I won't be awkward. My head will be up high. I'll be laughing and high fiving all my cool friends, maybe even slamming down a cold soda. You know why? Because you have been killing my vibe and I can't wait to get back to the real thing I need to be looking out for - THE BRAN-DAWG.
Peace out lame-o
BRANDAWG aka BIG MINNESOTA
